Results from a survey of missionaries: "Little evidence was found for serious discontent with housing conditions, financial support, or language learning. Instead, the struggles in adjustment came in such areas as relationships with peers and mission leaders, fulfillment in ministry, and inability to live up to expectations."
Stress
I've talked a lot about stress with the debriefing that I went to and also in writing about some of the books that I've read. But the author of this book, Myron Loss, brought up some things about stress and the body that were absolutely fascinating, because of things that I've seen in the mission community. He talked about how many times the only way that our bodies can deal with the stress level with which we operate in as missionaries is by exhibiting itself through illness: ulcers, headaches, backaches, high blood pressure,heart attack, fatigue, mental inefficiency, being prone to accidents, etc. And many times, the only way that a missionary will deal with the extreme stress in his/her life, is when the illness gets to a debilitating point. It is at that point that the person can step out of ministry without guilt, because they are officially "sick" and no one will fault them for getting treatment and rest. Much of the time, illness in missionaries cannot be alleviated without examining the stress levels in their lives.
Self-love and Self-esteem
"Self-love in its essence is a love for one's own soul: an appreciation for the worth of oneself as a person made in the image if God."
*Like many Christians, I've been taught that self-love and self-esteem are inherent in sinful man and that it essentially is equal to self-centeredness and pride. I was pleasantly challenged during my reading of this section.
"High self-esteem is not a noisy conceit. It is a quiet sense of self-respect, a feeling of self-worth, when you have it deep inside you're glad that you're you. Conceit is but white wash to cover low self-esteem. With high self-esteem you don't waste time and energy impressing others; you already know you have value. In contrast to this, people with low self-esteem experience many debilitating problems such as discouragement, depression, mental inefficiency, and emotional pain. They're more likely to exhibit anxiety and neurotic behavior, to perform less effectively under stress and failure, and to be less effective socially overall."
You might be asking, "How does this apply to missionaries"?
"Unless men can accept themselves, they are driven to pretend to be something they are not because they are afraid that the real person inside will be unacceptable to others. They believe that the means of acceptance by others is to live up to their expectations."
And this, my friends, can be a devastating thing in the missions community. Instead of focusing on God's expectations of us, we get caught up in trying to live up to man's expectations, and that rarely turns out for the good. As someone who has always set big goals for myself and likes to please others in authority, I've learned what a dangerous thing it is to your soul to get caught up in pleasing man. Men are ultimately sinful- even Christian men. When I concentrate on doing right in God's eyes, my self-esteem and soul-love are much, much higher than when I'm attempting to meet the expectations of man. Self/Soul love and self-esteem are found in knowing who I am in Christ, and that my Creator has made me in His image. What beautiful words are found in that amazing statement: I was made in His image. And when I accept and embrace and believe that statement, that is when true self-love and self-esteem comes. And from that self/soul love, I can operate and serve in a manner that fully reflects His love to others.
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